Only my day would start with a call from the human resources department at my work asking me to come in early so we could have a "necessary" meeting.
When I asked them what was up, they just said it was important they talk to me as soon as possible.
I agreed to meet with them, but you call me this early you get me as is. FYI - when going in for an important surprise meeting with your human resources department it might be a good idea to change out of your Spider-Man pajama pants. Lesson learned.
My meeting was with the head of human resources, the plant manager and their lawyer. They didn't waste any time on pleasantries. Instead, they got right to the point. Which was, "you have to be very careful what you say to the temporary employees. "
Since I wasn't sure exactly what they were referring to I had to ask them to go into more detail. To which they responded by laying several photos out in front of me.
Oops. That's what they were mad about.
So... last night at towards the end of my shift, I heard some of the temporary employees complaining about their hours and how much money they were making.
It was a pretty slow night and I was bored out of my mind. I'm guessing that might account for what came out of my mouth next.
I said, "To bad you guys didn't work here like 100 years ago. Apparently, the founders of this company were totally paranoid and didn't trust the banks with all the money they were making. So, what they did was bury half their fortunes in a steel vault under the cement floor in the Harley Davidson room. I tell you guys... if they ever tear up that floor, someone is going to be set for life."
It is also possible I might have given them a hand drawn map and made a few 'Xs' to represent spots where the fortune is rumored to be buried. I felt it added a little something extra to the story. Who doesn't love a good visual aid after all.
Well, according to human resources, those employees put a little more stock in my story than I thought they would.
The three temps waited until their shift ended and everyone went home. They then proceeded to break the lock to the tool room and "borrowed" a few shovels and pickaxes.
When the security guy arrived at 4:30 am to do his walk through, he stumbled upon the three guys digging away.
Apparently human resources thinks my story is what motivated them to do what they did. I say it's pure coincidence. There's no proof I influenced them at all. To which they responded by playing me a clip from the security cameras of the guys singing, "We're going to be rich" and waving my hand drawn map in the air.
Oops.
Luckily, since telling a story isn't exactly a crime, the most they could legally do was call me in for that meeting... and move me to a machine far away from any of the other employees.
Good thing I brought my iPod.
