For far too long, the distribution of hot dogs has been under the control of the elite few... Sonic, A&W, Pinks, etc. These despots would have us wait in seemingly never ending lines, inside and drive-thru, for what could be hours just to get one hot dog.
You can, of course, get more than one if you want, but at an average cost of $4.00 for a hot dog, only the truly wealthy can afford that luxury.
That is why I am saying, "NO MORE!". It is time for us to take the hot dog back for the people. So, on this day of celebration I am sending out a call to arms. I say to you grab your mustard, grab your ketchup, grab any other condiment or topping you will need and join me in laying siege to the tyrants who would monopolize and repress the hot dog.
Now, I know we as people haven't really sieged in a while. In fact, I don't think there has been a really good siege since the middle ages. Ah, now that was a time for some quality seiging. There wasn't a week that went by where one castle or another wasn't being sieged upon.
It is time people. Let us gather our forces and take back what is ours. Yes, some of us will fall victim to food coma and won't make it, but you have to be willing to pay that price. I know I am.
I beg of all of you to join me. Let history speak of this day not just as some cheap marketing ploy to sell hot dogs, but as the day hot dogs were returned to the people and America was reborn.
